| bored.... |
[Aug. 21st, 2005|06:01 pm] |
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havnt updated in a while, just found out i have a warrant out for my arrest....yay, also i owe this guy like 400 dollars cause my rx7 got towed, now im thinking about my escort, im prolly gonna owe that guy money too, need a job, im gonna start hunting soon, im bored as hell, sad that blues gone, nobody is really around right now, shit if im in a car that gets pulled over, or if a cop checks my ID for ANY reason, haha i go to jail, oh no |
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| first night in |
[Jul. 23rd, 2005|01:03 am] |
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god dammit, my goal of summer, to party every night, so far ive acomplished it, till now this is the first night ive stayed in, cause nobody can or wanted to get me, sux havin everybody hate me right now, i didnt see you standing next to the car natalie or i would have let you in no problem i mean there werent even any cops, i swear i didnt see u, cops at the heinzs factory sucked cause i had to run with my back pack full of paint for a while which made me get my asthsma (spelling) going for the night. anyway shits gay right now sombody be nice to me |
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| too bad this is hella gay |
[Jul. 17th, 2005|12:56 pm] |
xluvisoveratedx: hi broodlyric: sup xluvisoveratedx: nothing broodlyric: cool broodlyric: u goin to sandys thing today xluvisoveratedx: i guess xluvisoveratedx: yah xluvisoveratedx: after work xluvisoveratedx: u broodlyric: most likely broodlyric: if i have a ride xluvisoveratedx: thats cool broodlyric: seens how my cars broke and shit xluvisoveratedx: yah broodlyric: so when are we gonna talk xluvisoveratedx: about what broodlyric: this broodlyric: us broodlyric: our friendship xluvisoveratedx: idk now i guess broodlyric: cause i think its bullshit broodlyric: that u think i only call u when i need a ride someware xluvisoveratedx: yah broodlyric: everytime i called u except for when my ass was stranded in livermore i wanted to hang out with u broodlyric: but u were either hanging out wtih jay r already, or couldnt hang out xluvisoveratedx: k broodlyric: do u even wanna try? broodlyric: any more? broodlyric: people think me n u just shouldnt be friends xluvisoveratedx: i dont really know broodlyric: i see broodlyric: well do u care at all? broodlyric: just be strait with me xluvisoveratedx: yah i care xluvisoveratedx: but broodlyric: well why do u hate me then, what did i do to u? xluvisoveratedx: ok like the other night for example me and steph went to get u and u didnt say thanks for coming to get u broodlyric: was i pissed off? xluvisoveratedx: u didnt say thanks for letting u use my phone broodlyric: ok i see where ur comming from xluvisoveratedx: u threw the phone at me and i had a huge headache and i was crying after it hit me broodlyric: but its me and i figure u no im always greatful for you when you help me out broodlyric: cause i am broodlyric: i was so pisseed of that night broodlyric: at u xluvisoveratedx: why were u pissed at me broodlyric: just cause of all the same old shit broodlyric: of how when u get a bf shti totally changes broodlyric: ur acting a lot more bitchy lately broodlyric: i say hey ashley broodlyric: ur first response is broodlyric: NO im not giving u a rdie anyware broodlyric: wtf is that? broodlyric: i had been drinking, and jerikca wanted to come over broodlyric: but w/e broodlyric: y do we keep going threw this broodlyric: rather broodlyric: why do I keep going threw this broodlyric: its all great for u broodlyric: i just cant understnad why u act the way u act xluvisoveratedx: u always want me to get u or get someone and im sick of driving everywhere and getting in trouble for all the miles im putting on my car broodlyric: all the time broodlyric: yea i always want u to get me xluvisoveratedx: then just forget about me broodlyric: cause i always wanna hang out with u xluvisoveratedx: maybe we shouldnt be friends then broodlyric: but u never wanna hang out with me broodlyric: u always have gas to go get jay r broodlyric: u dont worry about the miles it takes to take u n jay r somware xluvisoveratedx: b/c he gives me money broodlyric: fuck me right? broodlyric: I SAID IDE GIVE U MONEY! broodlyric: son of a bitch if u want money ask me broodlyric: ill giv eu money broodlyric: w/e broodlyric: gas xluvisoveratedx: u never did tho broodlyric: ill pay broodlyric: i would broodlyric: u say nothign about it broodlyric: and just tell me oh myt car got taken away broodlyric: then i see it parked at stevens latere that night broodlyric: that really makes me mad/sad broodlyric: ide rather have u just be strait with me broodlyric: and be like no i dont like u as a friend any more i only wanna hang out with jay r now sorry broodlyric: and ide be pissed for a little bit broodlyric: but i guess ide get over it broodlyric: and u care to much about ur god dam money broodlyric: when i had the blazer, the mirage, the FC i never made anybody pay for gas broodlyric: the escort even broodlyric: but u never really rode with me in the escort broodlyric: cause u had ur car xluvisoveratedx: i have 21 fuckin dollars in the bank xluvisoveratedx: a month ago i had like 400 broodlyric: i HAVE 85! broodlyric: do u buy ur own food? xluvisoveratedx: ok well my parents are gonna flip when they find out i have nothing in the bank xluvisoveratedx: when im not home broodlyric: my ticketys broodlyric: tuition when ever that is broodlyric: i have to pay again for this test broodlyric: thats 80 right there broodlyric: u no broodlyric: we all got problems xluvisoveratedx: see then u should care about your money since u need it xluvisoveratedx: just like i do xluvisoveratedx: thats why i care too much about it broodlyric: if u car eto much broodlyric: u get stressed broodlyric: and live a shitty llfe broodlyric: life* broodlyric: i try my hardest not to broodlyric: im generally a happy guy wouldnt u say? broodlyric: even with all this bull shit i go threw xluvisoveratedx: yah broodlyric: last night my dad told me he was so much happyer for those 3 months that i moved out broodlyric: god dam taht hurt broodlyric: i need to move out again broodlyric: but i have no ware to go xluvisoveratedx: yah broodlyric: but all this is besides the point broodlyric: i dont like where our friendship is going broodlyric: do u? xluvisoveratedx: not really broodlyric: do u want to fix it? xluvisoveratedx: to tell u the truth im not sure broodlyric: dam xluvisoveratedx: u put soo much guilt on me for spending time with jay r more then u and everything else...friends shouldnt do that broodlyric: friends broodlyric: huh xluvisoveratedx: best friends broodlyric: i guess u just dont realize how it makes me feel broodlyric: to hear u say no i cant hang out then to see you hanging otu with jay r broodlyric: or that u just dont want to hang out with me broodlyric: over soem gas or money broodlyric: and u no xluvisoveratedx: b/c ur totally different now broodlyric: i dont care if u hang out with jay r broodlyric: hes my friend to broodlyric: we could all hang out? xluvisoveratedx: u dont understand how u act now broodlyric: u dont understand how YOU act now xluvisoveratedx: u try to be cool u try too hard at times broodlyric: i mean god dam do u reallyt hink u and jay r are gonna last for ever? xluvisoveratedx: u never used to be like this broodlyric: and you never used to be liek this either xluvisoveratedx: just because u dont want us to broodlyric: dude broodlyric: that has no fucking relevence broodlyric: do YOU think u will honestly xluvisoveratedx: idk broodlyric: and if u didnt broodlyric: who would be there for u when it went south broodlyric: I WOULD! broodlyric: like i said broodlyric: no matter how fucked up broodlyric: how mean broodlyric: or how sad ue ver made me broodlyric: i cant just NOT be ur friend broodlyric: u dont get that maby xluvisoveratedx: yah i know broodlyric: to hear u just now say that u dont wanna fix our friendship broodlyric: god dammit broodlyric: i used to sit around broodlyric: and say to my self broodlyric: friends, they come and go broodlyric: but thsi is something diffrent broodlyric: i guess it was true broodlyric: jande broodlyric: alex broodlyric: now you broodlyric: and how do i try to hard to be cool? xluvisoveratedx: back before u started hanging out with steven and all them did u smoke as much as u do now? broodlyric: nope xluvisoveratedx: exactly broodlyric: thats not me trying to be cool ashley broodlyric: look broodlyric: i liekd getting high broodlyric: but before i hung out with them all, nobody else really smoked xluvisoveratedx: yah i guess broodlyric: and since they smoke all the time, and its FREE To me, i smoke all the time broodlyric: so are we done broodlyric: or what broodlyric: do u plain and simple still want to be friends with me broodlyric: cause im just so sick of being pissed off all the time broodlyric: let me ask u a question broodlyric: why dont u want to hang out with me? xluvisoveratedx: if its b/c of me then whats the point in even being friends with me broodlyric: like why dont u ever call me up lik ehey wanna go do something? broodlyric: ? xluvisoveratedx: i dont know broodlyric: another question broodlyric: earlyer u said u hang out with jay and have gas and shit cause he gives you money broodlyric: if he didnt broodlyric: would u still? xluvisoveratedx: yah broodlyric: lol broodlyric: thot so broodlyric: but oh if i dont broodlyric: w/e broodlyric: i still wanna be ur friend broodlyric: and we can say yes were still friends broodlyric: and it can keep going on this way broodlyric: but do u realize how much it hurts me? xluvisoveratedx: yah broodlyric: like, for the 4 days u were single it was great broodlyric: we were great friends broodlyric: hanging otu all the time broodlyric: now we never hang out broodlyric: and u always do that broodlyric: and this isnt the first time weve had this converstaion xluvisoveratedx: this is why im not sure if i still want to be friends b/c u tell me like its all my fault which i guess it is but it hurts me knowing that someone who id consider a best friend a brother treats me like this and puts this pressure on me broodlyric: how do i treat u? broodlyric: u say i put pressure on u cause u hang out wtih jay r so much broodlyric: i dont care if u hang out with jay r 24/7 broodlyric: im just sad theres no time to hango ut with me broodlyric: jay r has nothing to do with this broodlyric: u just never wanna hang otu with me broodlyric: and u get pissed off if u have to come get me to bring me to where the group is at broodlyric: why do i feel so much diffrently about this then you do? broodlyric: maby cause if this ends, you still have somware to go broodlyric: and i dont broodlyric: cause then u get them all xluvisoveratedx: yah broodlyric: and how awkward it would be to be around you broodlyric: or jay r broodlyric: or steven broodlyric: or any of them broodlyric: what then broodlyric: fuck broodlyric: we have to stay friends broodlyric: no other option xluvisoveratedx: why xluvisoveratedx: if i hurt u that bad broodlyric: cause how many tiems have i said it broodlyric: its like why dont u wanan stay friends? broodlyric: it seems like u dont want to broodlyric: and ur just looking for a reason xluvisoveratedx: i dont have a reason broodlyric: do u still want to be friends broodlyric: yes broodlyric: or broodlyric: no xluvisoveratedx: no broodlyric: r we gonna keep it civil xluvisoveratedx: what u mean xluvisoveratedx: like im not gonna avoid u or ignore u broodlyric: thats what i meant, as in sd broodlyric: fcuk xluvisoveratedx: what broodlyric: i never thot this would happen xluvisoveratedx: why broodlyric: cause it was me n u xluvisoveratedx: things MIGHT change xluvisoveratedx: im not sure broodlyric: well like i said i can never not be friends with u, so i guess we may not be friends now, but im here for u broodlyric: dont worry th o, i wont be calling u for any rides broodlyric: or help iff im stuck or something broodlyric: but if u need help xluvisoveratedx: u know that im still here for u too and if u need help u can come to me broodlyric: well thats what friends do broodlyric: wtf broodlyric: you dont know how fucked up i am right nnow xluvisoveratedx: how broodlyric: what do u mean how broodlyric: my best friend in the world broodlyric: the person who i thot was my only REAL friend broodlyric: the person who has always been ther for me over the past 3 years broodlyric: just told me, she didnt wanna be my friend any more xluvisoveratedx: i know:-\ broodlyric: but know one thing xluvisoveratedx: what broodlyric: no matter what i say or how i act broodlyric: i dont want you to say yea ok i wanna be ur friend again out of pitty broodlyric: or because of how its makeing me feelk xluvisoveratedx: k broodlyric: all i ever wanted was people to be strait with me |
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| confused???? |
[Jul. 11th, 2005|07:39 pm] |
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so this weekend was kinda weird. i dont exactly know how to explain it, i spent 4 days in my most favorite place in the world. it was for my 18th birth day, most of my friends were there too. but it was still weird as hell. the 1st night there was the best night by far. then the next day we met up with everybody which was good and bad, im glad i got to see everybody we had some good times, but other times there were just killin it for me havin to search around everyware and miscomunications, god dam i need a cell phone. met pinion whose pretty cool randomly drunk walking up to us, he stayed the night with us then he found me on my space which is neat. lots of beach/sand/ocean/bonfire/stargazing didnt hit the boardwalk up except for 1 time NICE i HATE the boardwalk, i know santacruz like the back of my hand now SCORE! got a SICK ass tee shirt thanks ashley, found a dog/lost a dog, still havnt left my mark, sublime came on 3 times while i was there NOICE!, lots and lots of flipping off random people, got 3 tickets, sleeping in parking spots with open bottles of liqure haha steven, cops hella messing with us, got banned from "our" beach haha yea like im never going back there haha, my car broke and its in livermore now, i no longer have a car. buffalo bells is the BEST god dam bitch ass bitch doug ass bitch food you'll ever eat. the CHP in santa cruz are hella cool haha YOU know why if u know why. and i realized, then and there, that staying on the beach for the rest of my life would NOT be a bad life, its official i HAVE to live there before i die, and im getting a bench hopefully. i love the light house and the rocks. swimming at 1 in the morning the night of my birth day god i was on such a high. walking in to that licker (dont know how to spell it) store to buy my first lotto ticket and pack of ciggs was great, meeting all the random ppl we met was awsome. thanks to all that came. bitch ass microwave! |
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| whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat |
[Jul. 4th, 2005|12:55 am] |
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HAHAHAHHAH i got kicked out of my house again, i guess people really dont change, im hella hungry and i want jack in the box, im bout to go get some duble cheese burgers, yAy! k bye |
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| its like singing along, to words you dont even know |
[Jun. 27th, 2005|01:24 pm] |
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well got dammit, all i have to say is it was the best night of summer so far. me my cuzin jay-r and liseth went to santa cruz, we had so much fun, 7 out of 10 on the list aint bad we'll get all 10 next time for sure. smokin out at the light house when we first got there, its my favorite spot in teh whole world it was the best cig ive ever smoked. we vowed to go at LEAST 2 times a month from now on, and seens how my birth day is in 14 days and we gonna get a motel down there for like 3 days or so it should be a good ass time, "hey jay-r, help wanted" "why, is he a murrrrrrderrrrrerr?" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA god dammit good times, lovin life right now |
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| time for a compilation |
[Jun. 16th, 2005|12:34 am] |
since this kind of shit always happens to me, im going to compile all the scary, sorta near death experiances as of late, 1)when i wrecked my mitsubishi i was 2 inchs from death 2)that night on tesla, brakes locked up, about 5 inchs from death 3)when nigger dans punk ass hit me in the face with a rock and broke my nose at the aquaducts 4)when i was skating and that truck ran my ass over 5)last nights car flipping adventure holy crap thats like 5 times in the past year |
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| more near death experiances |
[Jun. 16th, 2005|12:33 am] |
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dam got into a lil car wreck last night, my buddy kinda went off the road and we rolled the truck. paramedics say i have a consussion aint that a bitch. be nice to me now i have a concussion thank you |
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| blah |
[May. 27th, 2005|01:21 pm] |
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man, im so upset, just yesterday i sold my first FC fiona for 470 dollars to this kid, and just now i got a call from a friend telling me he just SAW this kid smash my rx7 up into some honda the day after he bought it. man that sux i loved that car. i finished my book YAY! |
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| its like, idk |
[May. 22nd, 2005|10:57 pm] |
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im like so deppressed over this shit, what did i ever do to make things diffrent, shit was great, now she doesnt even wanna hang out with me, shes got more important people to see, better places to go, FUCK that, all the times ive been there, helped her out, what the hell happend, i feel sick, i have to go throw up |
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| its been a while |
[May. 17th, 2005|12:15 am] |
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long time no entry, shit sux super bad, me and ashley arent the same, and theres still so much shit i have to worry about, gay shit that makes me wanna go hear sad music and stuff, i dont get life. why does shit gotta change, ever since i got kicked outta my house and now that me n my legal gaurdian are on the outs, everything is so diffrent, so not the way it used to be, i dont think it should have to be that way. its really depressing that it is. i need money, i need to sell my car, a 1986 base model rx7 if ur interested 500 bux, please buy it, i need the money so bad, so so bad. |
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| haha some people |
[Apr. 25th, 2005|11:47 pm] |
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today day was eventful, attempted to put a system in the truck (didnt work) attempted to remove a tow package, LOL (didnt work) ppl randomly walk up in the house like they know whats up chillin for hella hours when they know they shouldnt be here, all in all a good day, got my hair all grassy from doin the worm on the lawn (had to show some peeps whats up), got some interesting photos of casey.......on myspace shortly dont trip |
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| 3 o clock in the morning |
[Apr. 21st, 2005|02:53 am] |
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a wise man once said you find your greatest enlightenment in the dark..... well ive been sitting here in the darkenss of my room for hours on end, and nothing, i still cant figure out what life is the way life is, i suppose once you have as much time alone as i do now, u start to think way to much, analizing everything, i think thats how i am, nothing is random anymore, im always looking for a pattern, but i havnt found one for my bigger problems in life, why did i have to grow up so fast? why do i have to worry about all kinds of shit now? im just a kid, at least i thot i was, where did my child hood go? |
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| so its like what the fook right |
[Apr. 20th, 2005|12:10 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] | life right now REALLY fucking sux yo. check it out right so like ok im kicked outta my house, living at a friends house, thank god hes my friend or ide be living noware. then right so like this other person who i think is cool is all on me and what not which is cool and what ever but then shes dating my other good friend and i dont want it to go down like that cause then he would get mad and hate me for ever, ok so then my other 2 good friends are dating and thats cool its just i get sick every time i hear about shit they do and what not, dont ask me why i have no clue, ok so then i have nothing to turn to any more for anything, my car situation is uber ghey right, and like my dads a fat cock monster and is being uber ghey and then my whole school situation is bunk as hell cuase im SO not gonna graduate no matter how hard i work, so ima have to get a GED and that sux but w/e ive accepted it, sublime just aint cuttin it no mo, i mean back in teh day right ide be feelin like this and just turn on some sublime 15 minits later ide be good to go, it was something more back then, now, well its just music, i have nothing to hope for, nothing to look forward to, what can i look forward to? let see, ok in the future i will be a GED, still working at BK driving my busted ass ride (maby), making next to no money, and not being able to support my self, where the fuck am i sposed to go, what the hell am i sposed to do, so its like ok turn to your friends for help, but they cant help me, nobody can help me, like my friends are there for me and all but what can they do, they can listin to me say exactly what im saying here, it might make me feel better, but it doesnt help me out any, and its like i have no escape when shit builds up i have noware to go, i get to just sit and get all this bull shit thrown at me all day, and so what the hell am i sposed to do, theres only so much a guy can take before he just strait gives up on life, and i dont want that to happen, you dont want that to happen but hey, what does it matter if it does happen? whats the diffrence, will anybody know? i mean you and i would, but thats it, i havnt made a big enough impact for anybody to care weather or not im here or gone, and i know for sure that ill go crazy if i keep it up, everyday the same manotonous tune, wake up, shower, maby eat, sit around, go to work, come home, sit around, sleep at 3 in the morning, wake up, shower, maby eat, sit around, go to work, come home, sit around sleep at 3, and for what, what is all this getting me, where am i going in life? everybody has goals and aspireations, mine are totally gone, waht do i have to live for..... |
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| what ever |
[Apr. 19th, 2005|11:48 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | blah | ] | so it looks as tho i might get to keep my fiona after all whoo hoo i guess, im kinda spent of the whole topic anyway, i just want a fucking car to get me places gawd dam, im sick of having to get rides and shit, plus, idk shits been weird lately, idk how to explain it, i just feel diffrent and it sux but idk we'll see how things go i guess |
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| life sux |
[Apr. 15th, 2005|08:04 am] |
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dam man, life hella sux, its uber ghey and wont go the way i want it to, i dont like it |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 29th, 2005|11:26 am] |
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holy fook, spring break is uber ghey now, theres nothing to do, where is everybody, i hope it doesnt stay as uber ghey as it is now, sombody fooking come hang out with me or somthing |
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| what a day |
[Mar. 26th, 2005|09:06 am] |
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lemmi start at the beginning, me ducky ashley alex and jande are all chillin, but then everybody but ducky has to go to work, so me n ducky are chillin at my house and decided to go skate to mt. mikes to visit ashley, along the way im skatin down the street and a guy pulling out of a parking lot in his truck wasnt looking and fuckin hit me, now my wrist hurts, a while later round 10 or so we went to a party my friend jesse was at, and man i got really wasted, i was throwing up everyware and my head hella hurts now, it was pretty fun tho lol, but now i feel like shit |
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| i guess it was neat |
[Mar. 25th, 2005|12:14 pm] |
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thursday, had my meeting/class at delta charter, the whole school experiance was a bit weird but i miss it, a lil party went down, it was ok, i hope ashley makes it home ok, i prolly shouldnta left her there... |
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